So, as I am putting away groceries today I made a HUGE realization about my life. I've become too preoccupied with other things and put my family, my home on the back burner. I've been striving to be that "it" mom, the "it" person for ministries and volunteering. Trying to impress who? I don't know. What I do know is Travis has been telling me for a loooong time that I need to scale back. And, slowly I have started to. Today, for the first time in a long time, I stayed home. I took the kids to school, I clipped coupons, did the dishes, picked up the kids' rooms, did some laundry, made Valentine's Day Cookies for Kalib's class. I am happier today than I have been in a long time. I wasn't worried with going here and there and doing this or that for a ministry or a school function. Not that those things are bad, but for me, at this point in my life, they've become a burden. Not to anyone's fault except my own. I think now, the thing I am looking forward to about moving is the scaling back even more. Refocusing on my family life, my home. I'm not going to withdraw from society, I'm not going to become a hermit that lives only for my family. But, I am going to put my heart where it needs to be. I am going to do the one thing I always wanted to do. I am going to be a wife and a mom that cares lovingly for her family. I want to have a strong Christ centered marriage and raise successful children that always put God first. If those two single things are the only great things I ever do in my life, I've accomplished more than I ever dreamed. I love my family and I want to dedicate my life to ministering to them. After all, I know it's what God has called me to do in my time on this earth. I am no longer going to stand for society telling me I'm worthless because being a "stay at home mom" is what I choose to do with my time and my life. It is the job God has chosen me for and I'm going to do it well, not half heartedly like I have been.
Oh, and one more thing, before I sign off....Trav, I'm sorry for the things I've neglected in our life while I've been figuring this out! You're so great to hang in there and let things happen in God's timing! I love you forever!!!
3 comments:
I totally agree. I was just telling you today that I don't want to take on things that make me too busy. I love spending time with my family. Sometimes I regret that the gym takes me away from home, but I need the gym so that will have to stay. My favorite days are when we stay at home together and all hang out. I can't wait until our next base. I will rethink joining the spouses group or getting too involved in anything.
Girl I think that it is awesome you are doing this. It doesn't matter when you realized this, but that you did. We all have these moments and they have to come on our timing and through Gods loving guidance. You are a great mom and always have been. Now you are
going to be a great mom with A LOT more time :O)
It may take some adjusting, but work through it, God will bless you and then you will learn to love it. Once I had Sonny, I had no choice but to slow down, especially with homeschooling, but now I am so happy. You rock girl, keep being the amazing mom and Christian woman you are.
This post made me cry. It did. It's so sweet and so sincere. I think you are a wonderful mom and wife. Jason and I were talking about that on our long drive home from y'alls house. I totally admire you and look up to you for all the things you do.
I pray God will bless your family even more at your new base. I really hope we get stationed there with y'all! :)
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